Darren Sharper: Sexual Deviant, Terrible Person

Once the most hardenist hittin safety inna league, Darren Sharper likely won’t be seeing an NFL field – or respect from society – ever again.

A professional “tough guy” who made his fortune knocking 250-pound men into the dirt, Sharper is apparently too much of a pussy to try and hit on women like a real man. He couldn’t stop Greg Jennings from putting the team on his back, and he can’t even get into a chick’s pants without the aid of drugs. If you’re going to enhance your “game” with substances, at least do it on the field with steroids like a normal person you sick fuck.

Seriously, pro athletes have every advantage in the world: grade-A physical condition, boatloads of money, fame, and talent. By and large, women THROW themselves at pro athletes. With all of that going for you, if you need ROOFIES to get laid, you’re probably better off just killing yourself. Do you even talk to girls, bro?

In all seriousness, if this story turns out to be true, they should lock him in with Aaron Hernandez. The alleged potential serial killer may also be a sick demented gangbanger jerkoff, but he’s more of a man than Sharper could ever hope to be. Maybe he can teach Sharper a thing or two about how to not be pussy. He’ll need that lesson where he’s going.

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